5Weeks out

One day up, two days down.

Im 5 weeks out yesterday but still feel like shit!!

I wish I could explain it to ppl who didnt have this surgery. It doesn't matter if ur aunt healed in 2Weeks or ur mother went back to work 3 days after, or ur sisters cousins brothers girlfriend was running a marathon after a month....everybody heals differently. My hormones are all over the place...one minute im laughing, then im cursing everybody out, then im crying...on top of everything I have this overwhelming feeling of loss, depression almost. Im in this house, aggravated all day but when I get to go out im exhausted. I get pains out of nowhere, I can't fit in anything cuz everything is swollen...... This shit is scary! Im not myself, im not comfortable around ppl no more. But how do I explain this when everybody wonders....u dont understand unless u been thru it, and I am so thankful that I have family and friends that have been through it. Im thankful for the support website I found. (im on there almost as much as I am here) of course I cant wait to enjoy the good points of this surgery, but until then I never know whos gonna wake up in my bed, and aint nobody here!,its just me (Kevin hart voice) lol

3Weeks post op

I think I broke my ovary....or something. I dont know. I.just know im in pain, im swollen and im scared.

3Weeks ago I had a supracervical abdominal hysterectomy due to fibroids and andeomyosis. I wasnt listening, ill admit it. The day I came home from the hospital I had to fix my bed railing and catch my air conditioner! (at this time I shouldn't have been lifting ANYTHING) over the next few days I rested, walked around as much as I could and pretty much took it easy. except maybe opening a window or grabbing a water from the bottom of the fridge.

A few days ago I decided to go for a,ride with my mom and sister to Walmart....of course, the handicapped carts were taken or not working. So I had to push the shopping cart. I tried to be,as careful as I could as I grabbed a few groceries. By the time we left the store, not even an hour later I was exhausted and the swelly belly was setting in. that night, I couldn't sleep. I started cleaning, which I shouldnt do. But I couldnt take it anymore....my kids literally clean all,day but its like as soon as its clean, its dirty again. I couldnt take it! The next morning was a fit of emotional rage!!! I honestly dont even remember what threw me off. All I know is I was screaming and crying and throwing things....including my mattress. (im ashamed to even say that. Even though I obviously couldn't move it far I believe I moved it enough to hurt myself) I stayed in bed for the next two days, crying. I was in so much pain and so afraid of what I just did I was beside myself!

I called the doctor,  chalking my emotional rollercoaster up to only getting one hour sleep in 26 hrs. I asked for a prescription to help me,sleep....I was told no. I almost cried on the,phone.

Cut to today....3Weeks, 2days after having my uterus trashed, my remaining organs pulled pushed and,rearranged....I sit here with a swollen lump under the right side of my incision. If I lay down it hurts more. I was going to wait until tomorrow but I got a feeling I will be making a Trip to the er tonight.

When I make it thru this I promise I will be keeping my ass still....completely! Next time I feel like moving furniture ill just lay my depressed ass down and cry it out.

This aint no joke!!!